SELF-LEADERSHIP & IT'S CHALLENGES

Ardeshir Jeejeebhoy
Jul 17
2 min read

Updated: Sep 18

Before any title, team, or triumph, there is a quieter, far more personal decision—to lead yourself. It’s not something others see. There’s no spotlight, no applause. But it’s the foundation of every self – assured individual, meaningful action, and fulfilled life. This is the essence of self-leadership. It begins not with grand plans, but with small, deliberate choices made when no one else is watching. It’s the discipline to do what’s right even when it’s hard, the courage to ask yourself tough questions, the heart to step back for loved ones to move ahead and the awareness to notice when you’re drifting from who you truly are. This is Self-leadership as an invisible thread running beneath your habits, your mind-set, and your voice in the world. It’s what gives you steadiness in the face of pressure, and clarity when everything around you is moving fast.

Make no mistake: this journey in Self - Leadership is not easy. The Captain in you will be tested—daily.

1. Old Patterns

We are creatures of habit—wired to repeat what feels familiar, even when it no longer serves us. These patterns can be subtle: saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” staying silent when your voice matters, avoiding risk because failure once stung. Over time, these repeated choices don’t just shape our actions—they begin to shape who we believe we are. When left unchecked, our behaviour starts to form the script we follow, the personality we present, the character we play in our own life story. Eventually, we begin to mistake these rehearsed responses for our true identity.

The challenge? Many of these behavior patterns were written in childhood, trauma, or fear—not choice. Self-leadership begins when you pause and ask, “Is this really me, or just a pattern I’ve memorised ?” Breaking the cycle isn’t easy. It’s uncomfortable. You’ll feel resistance. Your mind will try to lure you back with, “This is just who I am.” But it isn’t. You’re more than your default settings.

2. Fear of Judgment

Self-leadership is often lonely—not because you're alone, but because you're no longer performing for the crowd. Choosing growth over comfort means you’ll sometimes be misunderstood. People may not get why you're slowing down when everyone else is rushing, or why you're walking away from something because it does not align with your values.

3. Discomfort of Growth

Growth isn’t glamorous. It’s messy, inconvenient, and sometimes painful. When you choose to lead yourself, you will outgrow roles, relationships, and routines that once felt like home. That’s hard. It’s far easier to stay in the familiar—where expectations are clear, and you know how to perform. But growth asks something different. It asks you to stretch beyond what you’ve mastered. To try, fail, reflect, and still move forward. It may mean sitting with uncomfortable truths—about your fears, your avoidance, and your blind spots. It may mean being the beginner again.

4. Taking Responsibility

Blame is easy. It’s convenient to point fingers at the boss, the traffic, the economy. But self-leadership starts the moment you stop outsourcing your power. When you awaken the Captain in you, excuses lose their grip. You may not control every storm, but you do control your sail.